2016 New Expert List

[Jim Dugger]

Someone comments on how dumb you make them feel and this is what flies right over your head.
Not another race club. The, "Jim Dugger makes me feel stupid" club.

See what happens when you think someone is smart?

[Brandon Orr]

See what happens when you think someone is smart?

Just keep doing the bourbon reviews.

[Jim Dugger]

Just keep doing the bourbon reviews.

I've been enjoying two different flavors of Michter's lately. Really first class.

[Ted Phillips]

I want to protest this trophy. Certainly I've made it into the top 10 by now. What's the process for that?

about 12 places to go it seems:
http://www.cmraracing.com/memberlist...rt=posts&pp=30

[Brandon Orr]

I've been enjoying two different flavors of Michter's lately. Really first class.

I'm taking notes. Trying to head to Balcones sometime in the next few weeks with my father in law.

[David Proler]

about 12 places to go it seems:
http://www.cmraracing.com/memberlist...rt=posts&pp=30

At least I'm progressing.

[Dave Felio]

This is different to protesting a promotion, then coming back and winning everything in novice.

Now that I see this in writing I realize its a real gem, and I need to add it to my growing "Jackass, Sr. Edition" list. Who doesn't love the opportunity to really p1ss someone off for no important reason?

Here are some more I've collected off the Interweb over the years:

1. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
2. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
3. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
4. Practice making fax and modem noises.
5. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
6. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
7. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
8. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
9. Honk and wave to strangers.
10. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
11. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
12. type only in lowercase.
13. dont use any punctuation either
14. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
15. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
16. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
17. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
18. Ask people what gender they are.
19. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
20. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
21. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
22. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

At a Target or WalMart:
23. Take boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they aren't looking.
24. Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
25. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
26. Go to the Service Desk and try to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
27. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk where the antidepressants are.
28. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.
29. In the auto department, practice your 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

And now we can add:
30. Get promoted to Expert, then protest the promotion and come back to win all the Novice Races.

Sublime.

[Bryan Hodges]

You must be retired because no one else I know has that much time on their hands...

[Brandon Orr]

You must be retired because no one else I know has that much time on their hands...

that's what you think.......

[Tommy Hendricks]

Ok?